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Proposal for a Memorial Garden for Women Who Were Burned at the Stake for Witchcraft, but Who Were Probably Just Cat Ladies that Weren’t Really Into the Whole Christianity Thing and Lived on the Edge of the Woods like Hester Prynne and Knew a lot About Plants and Healed People in the Village with Herbal Craft From Time to Time...Or Maybe Were Into “Casting Spells” and Using Hallucinogenic Plants with their Friends, but That’s Cool Too and Not Really an Okay Reason to Burn Someone

Step 1: Create a garden plan based on the forms of two breasts emerging from the earth; essentially two small hills.

Step 2: Top each of these hills with a small running fountain, which emerges from a rounded stone. Ideally, these fountains are artesian wells. These fountains make no apologies for representing both breast milk and tears. (Note: Visitors are invited to quench their thirst from these witches nipples.)

Step 3: Plant one mound with the medicinal plants traditionally used in Europe, which might have been given by a local herbalist, such as: Queen Anne’s Lace (birth control), Raspberry (eases cramps), Yarrow (immune booster), Mullein (respiratory infections), Lemon Balm (anti-viral/bacterial) etc.

Step 4: Plant the second mound with the hallucinogenic-alkaloid producing plants associated with “witches flying ointment,” which was supposedly applied to the vaginal mucous membranes with the end of a broom. These plants include: Henbane (hyoscyamine, scopolamine), Jimson Weed (atropine, scopolamine), Belladonna (atropine), Wolfsbane (aconitine) and Opium Poppy (morphine).

Step 5: Conduct classes, which are open to the public, preferably on nights of the full moon, which show people how to use these plants for a wide range of beneficial purposes.

Proposal for a Memorial Garden for Women Who Were Burned at the Stake